5- 90% Of My Mind Is With You

For the past few days I've been struggling with my unhealthy habit of over-analyzing the fabric of my everyday.  I've been dissecting things to pieces, restructuring those pieces over and over, and trying to find some semblance of sense or purpose to events/occurrences that most would find rather mundane.  I've been building and destroying hypotheses at an astronomical rate.  Every time it seems I've settled on an interpretation or perception of a certain situation, something (often times the most seemingly insignificant of details) comes and shakes the very foundation of my resolve.  And then it crumbles and I'm thrust back into doubt.

I tried to run with the idea above but then realized that I can't/shouldn't/won't.  I can't take such thoughts to any logical conclusion and those first few lines make it painfully obvious.  

I watched Into the Wild last night, which is Sean Penn's film adaptation of the book by Krakauer.  The movie left me with the strangest of feelings.  There you have a story which essentially embodies themes that I've been thinking (and dreaming) a whole lot about for the last while, yet I couldn't help but be consumed by a feeling of intense melancholy while watching it.  I was overcome by this implacable sense of loneliness and this feeling was only exacerbated by my walk home after the movie.  Even today, I still feel strangely blank about it.  I thought I'd be able to properly articulate my thoughts, but it seems that I've failed.  Oh well.

The story ends on a cautionary note.  It speaks of the necessity of sharing love and experiences with others; that happiness is bred by offering that which most keep in themselves to those they love most.  I think that such a simple and obvious sentiment is what touched me most, yet for some reason it's something I feel distanced from.

Again, oh well.